Site updates
August 31, 2006
As the awaken reader might have noticed I've updated the design of Petersen-inc.
You can now pick your own background. Use the little squares in the header.
I've updated the About page with some personal information and a picture.
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Eureka! Its alive!
August 30, 2006
YAY me!
I finally got videos on my blog. I got so excited that I just picked the first and best video from youtube.com.
Its with Shannen Doherty and some break-up program. (Crazy Americans) It doesn't show my political og religious direction in anyway. Its just a test!
I said its a test. Don't see it. Its only a test.
Update: WOOT! I lasted 32 secs. I couldn't stand watching this anymore.
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Chinese Striptease Funeral
August 29, 2006
I read in the news that the Chinese police are cracking down on the practice of hiring strippers for funerals.
Seriously.
Strippers for funerals.
Villagers believe that the more people who attend the funeral, the
more honored the dead person is. And naked women bring in the crowds. I
can think of no better way to honor a dead grandmother than by hiring
naked women to arouse her surviving husband while the in-laws watch.
Plus there’s a practical aspect to it. You want to make sure the guy
in the casket is really dead and not just faking it. There’s probably
an old Chinese saying that goes something like “If he gets a stiffy,
he’s not a stiff.” And don’t get me started about raising the dead.
This is actually from a strip club in Johannesburg, but you get the point.
It’s hard to pick my favorite part of this story, but one of the
contenders has to do with the name of the county where the police did
the crack down: Donghai.
I suppose you could pronounce it Dong-hay. But it’s more deliciously
ironic if it’s pronounced dong-high. If anyone knows it’s really
pronounced Dong-hay, don’t ruin it for me.
I didn’t see in the news report why the Chinese police were suddenly
cracking down on the strippers at funerals, but I have a theory. I
think I speak for all men when I say that at the age of 14 I would have
been willing to kill a cousin to look at a stripper. And remember that
those small villages in China don’t have cable TV and high speed
Internet. You pretty much have to choke someone to death just to
generate any entertainment that doesn’t involve dragon costumes and
tambourines.
The Chinese have given us gun powder, fireworks, chop sticks, and
now this idea. I hope it starts catching on in Denmark. I don’t know
what it would feel like to be sad and aroused at the same time, but I’m
willing to give it a try.
I wonder if it got to the USA. Unfortunately, they ruin everything over here. They’ll probably start
having mimes at funerals instead of strippers. But I have to admit it
would be funny watching a mime do his impression of being trapped
underground in a pine box.
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Windows Vista Pre-RC1 released. Get it while its hot
August 29, 2006
Microsoft has released Windows Vista Pre-RC1. Its open until 100,000 downloads.
You can find here
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No more Planet Pluto
August 28, 2006
Serious drinkers prefer to stay off the road on New Year’s Eve,
sometimes calling it “Amateur Night.” I am reminded of that witticism
as I watch the debate about whether Pluto is a real planet or a dwarf
planet.
To a professional humorist there is nothing more painful than a news
story that demands an obvious joke. The amateurs pile on and it gets
ugly fast. Example:
“If Pluto isn’t a planet, that’s Goofy! HAHAHAHAHAHA-SNORT!”
“Pluto isn’t a planet – he’s a DOG! WHAAHAHAAHAHAAA!!!”
“Pluto is a dwarf? I guess Disney put him in the wrong cartoon! HOOHAAHAHAHAHA!!!”
You see? Painful.
At the recent nerdfest where it was decided Pluto wasn’t a real
planet, one of the scientists held up a stuffed Pluto (the Walt Disney
kind) and an umbrella and wittily pointed out that Pluto was under the
umbrella of planets that include “dwarf planets.” The scientists all
laughed and snorted and wondered why they don’t get laid more often.
Call me old fashioned, but I don’t think Pluto should be the
funniest planet – or even the funniest non-planet. That distinction
belongs to another. Uranus, 8th celestial body from the sun, is part
miracle of gravity and part bung hole. It has earned its status as the
funny man of the cosmos.
Despite anything you have heard, Uranus is not a black hole and
there are no Klingons circling it. Nor does it have Venus envy. It is
simply the funniest of all planets, be they dwarf or regular. Some
things should never change.
Unlike Pluto, I believe there is life on the one true funny planet.
I believe there are primates and I believe they have evolved the power
of flight. But you probably won’t believe that until winged monkeys fly
out of Uranus.
Amateurs, please stay off the road.
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Fun With Celebrity Yearbook Photos
August 24, 2006
Click the thumbnails for larger photos:
Thanks to ONTD for the pictures! Most of these are pretty self explanatory but if you get stuck on any of these the answers are below.
First row: 1. Justin Timberlake, 2. Hilary Swank, 3. Jennifer Garner, 4. Johnny Depp, 5. Nelly Furtado, 6. Courteney Cox
Second row: 1. Michelle Pfeiffer, 2. Matt Damon, 3. Michael Douglas, 4. Britney Spears, 5. Brad Pitt, 6. Pink
Third row:
1. Billy Bob Thornton, 2. Halle Berry, 3. Halle Berry, 4. Eminem, 5.
Demi Moore, 6. Sean Combs, Puff Daddy, Diddy, Shiddy, whatever
Fourth row: 1. Avril Lavigne, 2. Meat Loaf, 3. Cameron Diaz, 4. George Clooney, 5. George Clooney, 6. Fred Durst
Fifth row: 1. Gwyneth Paltrow, 2. Gwen Stefani, 3. Jamie Lee Curtis, 4. Jack Nicholson, 5. Mariah Carey, 6. Sandra Bullock
Sixth row: 1. Meg Ryan, 2. Julianne Moore, 3. Tyra Banks, 4. Whitney Houston, 5. Angelina Jolie, 6. Angelina Jolie
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We Are Through!!!
August 23, 2006
My favourite football-team (soccer) FC Copenhagen finally made it to the UEFA Champions League!
After losing 2-1 at home in Parken, we managed to get a 2-0 in Amsterdam Arena, though it was a bit lucky. Nevermind FCK is playing in the Champions League.
The group draw is tomorrow, Thursday at 16.00 CET in Monaco.
More details to come.
I'm too excited!!!
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Bored at home? Create your own zoo!
August 8, 2006
See more here
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Report: Meat Now America’s No. 2 Condiment
August 4, 2006
Now this is getting scary:
"CHICAGO—Though once defined as just a stand-alone meal, meat has
risen quickly up the ranks to become the nation's second most popular
condiment, according to a study released by the U.S. Department of
Agriculture.
A pork chop tops a cheeseburger.
"In the past several years, meat's use as a way to enhance the
flavor of foods has increased exponentially," said Agriculture
Secretary Mike Johanns. "Ketchup is still number one, but at the rate
people are putting meat on top of other meats and foods, it may very
well surpass it by 2010."
"American consumption habits have made meat a necessity just so people can notice that they're eating something," Johanns added.
Johanns cited the rise of bacon as a condiment as the most universal
example of this trend. "By 2015, our researchers predict bacon alone
will supplant condiments as diverse as mustard and Worcestershire
sauce," Johanns said. "Crumbled 'bacon bits' are a classic addition to
salads, and in recent years, slabs of bacon are increasingly used to
wrap vegetables, fruits, and seafood. Adding bacon as a topping to
cheeseburgers is old news, but now we are seeing bacon-topped meatloaf,
bacon-covered chicken wings, and deep-fried, bacon-wrapped bacon
sprinkled on pork chops."
Fast-food restaurants have led the charge in pioneering the new
trend, Agriculture Department food chemist and study co-author Lynn
Starck said. "McDonald's discovered years ago that people aren't really
looking for some kind of spicy sauce to top their sandwiches," Starck
said. "Quite frankly, what they really want to pile on their hamburger
patty is another hamburger patty."
Mayonnaise—a mixture of egg and oil—was one of the original
condiments, premiering in the 18th century and growing in popularity as
diners sought toppings with flavors nearly as powerful as the food
beneath them. According to the report, this growth will continue into
the next century, with such new innovations as smearable beef packets,
kielbasa chutney, and squeeze-bottled chicken.
Pureéd-steak pump-action dispensers are already a staple at
condiment stations across the country, as an estimated 79 percent of
fast-food patrons now dip their fries not just into ketchup, but into
meat in one of its liquid forms.
High-end restaurants are also getting in on the act, with tuxedoed
waiters now offering freshly ground steak tartare and a lightly
seasoned pork mixture along with the more traditional black pepper at
every table.
"In many restaurants, they'll 'meat up' almost any plate on the
menu, even vegetarian ones, with an entire steak drooping over the top,
at the customer's request," Starck said. "Bologna sherbet and ham
brulée are also just two of the hot new condiment-based desserts we're
seeing more and more of."
Kraft Foods, makers of Jell-O, are expected to release their highly
anticipated pudding cups with dried veal sprinkles in November, and
Baskin-Robbins is experimenting with diced frozen frankfurters and
gelatinous pork orbs as toppings for their many flavors of ice cream.
Celebrity chefs such as Bobby Flay have enthusiastically embraced
the meat-condiment craze. "I've been dipping my onion rings in a
mixture of stone-ground white cornmeal, fresh thyme, and lightly
whipped bison meat for years now," Flay said. "A couple of years ago
doing something like that would have gotten me kicked off my five TV
shows. Now everybody's asking for the recipe."
"
News Source: The Onion
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So this can happen…
August 2, 2006
I've always seen the Star Trek universe as some kind of Utopia. (Man I would really love to get my hands on the holo-chamber)
Thank God Windows will still crash
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